[singlepic id=142 w=300 h=220 float=left]Unless you’ve been living under a rock for the past ten years, you’ve probably heard of this little show called ‘Top Gear’ and you’re more than likely one of the 33 million people tuning in to get their fix of what’s been voted the best programme of the decade.
It’s spawned copycat versions all over the world (most recently, South Korea) and has changed the face of motorised journalism as we know it, and the world of Top Gear set up at the London Excel centre was supposed to be the biggest, most action packed and adrenaline fuelled show of the year.
Did it live up to the hype, and the reputation of the award winning show?
UK Gent was down at the scene to find out…
The Olympics… but with cars… and explosions…
Dubbed as “The Live Action Arena”, hopes were set high. Perhaps my hyperactive imagination pictured some sort of massive fairground of tracks and obstacles and twists and turns that would put an entire week at Alton Towers to shame.
So I was a bit disappointed to find the show’s trio of presenters in the distance, lounging about on a steel finished replica of the show’s stage in the distance looking tiny and offering their usual banter between one another. Is that it?
As if reading my mind, Clarkson announced:
“Since none of us managed to get tickets to in the Olympic ballot, we thought we’ll do our own running, skipping and throwing events. But with cars. And explosions. And motorised chariots.”
Hell yes.
The opening ceremony for Top Gear Live’s recreation of the Olympics set the tone for the rest of the show as the stage suddenly slid and span away from sight, along with the three hosts as loud rock music shot through the air, lights dimmed and flames burst out behind a ramp as the Top Gear stunt driving team flew seemingly out of nowhere.
London transport got exciting with a power sliding double decker bus, V8 powered cabs throwing 360s and Subaru’s racing into the arena, bursting into flames and spinning out some beautiful donuts. The crowd went wild and I could literally feel the heat of the fired up cars on my face.
Injecting Olympic events with Excitement
Either out of sheer genius or taking an idea born out of too many pints down the pub, there was no lack of creativity or imagination in cooking up some truly weird and wonderful new ‘sports’.
Think ‘motorised limbo’ as Beefeaters who double as motocross stunt supermen flew through increasingly smaller gaps between two walls suspended in the air. Chariot racing, but take out the horses and stick four 22 horse powered scooters in their place.
And synchronised swimming? No thanks; it’s too wet and not nearly as dangerous, exciting or doused in petrol as we want it to be. The water and swimming were stripped out altogether as a team of Ford Focuses put on their own little show of spinning out and around one another before, sliding between one another with expert timing as fireworks lit up the arena.
James May injected curling with some much needed excitement after jumping onto a quad bike outfitted with a brush on the front… and Clarkson and Hammond getting comfortable in two Fiat Stilo’s on casters acting as the stones. Taking turns to break into a target painted on the arena’s floor, Hammond came out the winner after crashing into and knocking Clarkson out of the bull’s-eye and into the arena’s wall – to the applause and celebration of everyone.
After his defeat, Clarkson did try to keep things a bit traditional with some good, old fashioned hurdling… although the hurdle just happened to be a 125cc go kart and Lamborghini speeding up towards Joseph, one of the stunt team members. Either a new sport would be born from the crazy mind of Clarkson or we would have got to see a man be run over. With a well-timed BACKFLIP over the sports car, the Mentalist Hurdles was born.
… Not that anyone in the crowd actually wanted to see Joe get flattened by the Lamborghini… ahem.
The Supercar Beauty Pageant Parade
After all the cars exploding, crashing, sparks flying out of the exhausts and sounds of tires screeching across the arena, there was a rare moment of serenity and calm with the Olympic beauty pageant. The lights came down low and one by one, a parade of the most stylish, sexy and downright stunning super cars ever conceived rode into the arena.
Under the hypnotic sights of dimmed purple lighting and the violin crescendo of Kanye West’s ‘All of the Lights’, you could hear the beauties humming silently as they drew closer to the audience before parking up and creating a makeshift catwalk for the rest of the line up to ride down and show off its curves.
The cast included the Ferrari 458 Italia, Lamborghini Aventador, Mercedes SLS AMG, Porsche 911 GT2 RS and Ferrari Enzo, which Clarkson, Hammond and May had to decide which one car they would take home with them if they had to choose.
As they gave a run over for their reasons, I had to agree with May that the Ferrari 458 was the most beautiful of the lot, although let’s be honest; I’m not really going to be picky when faced with ANY of those ridiculously sexy – and ludicrously expensive – super cars.
And that’s why you’ve got to hate people like Jeremy Clarkson; because he can!
And keep in mind that he and his two co-hosts get PAID to do this. Top Gear live was every man’s dream playground. Taking some of the most sought after vehicles in the world – and some of the worst such as the City Rover (which was crushed under the wheels of a monster truck) – and getting behind the wheel and putting them through their paces in an assortment of exciting challenges.
“Wasn’t it supposed to be an hour long?”
Putting my bitterness and jealousy aside for a moment though, watching them do their thing, the banter between the three and everything else on offer at Top Gear Live was immensely entertaining. The show took no liberties in turning the excitement dial to max right off the bat, and perhaps the most surprising moment was the announcement that the show was over.
It was so action packed that the hour felt like fifteen minutes; there was barely any time to blink or you’d miss something, it was difficult at times to take in everything that was on show and there was never a dull moment.
It was something special alright and whether you’re young or old, a car geek or just looking to see fire set to cars in the middle of painting circles to the floor with some burning rubber, there was something for everyone.
It’s not hard to see why the people behind Top Gear have come up with such an exciting show that has spawned a worldwide following… and I for one can’t wait for it to return to our screens at home. Minus the fireworks scaring the crap out of us when I’m not expecting them, of course.
Jeremy and co will be coming at you with a brand new Top Gear Christmas special all the way from India next month.
P.S: It’s hard to tell how tiny Richard Hammond is from watching him on screen. When he’s standing in the middle of a big empty arena live, he makes Clarkson and May look like monsters.